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Monthly Archives: December 2012
A Cactus Named Spike
There once was a cactus named Spike.
Spike was born in a magical kingdom known as upstate New York, to a mother and father cactus that both loved him very much.
At age 5, Spike was sent to Kindergarten. While he missed his parents, he was ready for the real world. Spike met lots of new friends, and spent his days coloring and learning his Read more [...]
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Posted in Columns, Creative Writing, Josh, Miscellaneous
Tagged cactus, dke, saxophone, soccer, the green light
The More-Ality of the Internet
The internet is a beast. It’s rapidly changed the way we live our lives, particularly in that it has entirely streamlined communication. No longer must you wait to get your news fix until the next day’s paper comes out. No longer do military servicemen need to wait weeks to receive letters from their loved ones back home. No longer must you Read more [...]
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Posted in Columns, Josh, Miscellaneous, Philosophy, Video
Tagged china, demon snow squad, diatribe, donahue, doors, dss, historical materialism, internet, judging, karl marx, secret service, sinatra, windows
The Mane of My Existence
Hair. Science-forsaken hair. It's everywhere in my bathroom. It’s sprinkled all over the edges of my porcelain tub, as well as the rim of my toilet, right over the Gerber stamp where the backboard meets the hoop. Shaving clippings cover both the top of my sink and the floor below, all while let’s-just-be-safe-and-call-it-leg hair is caked Read more [...]
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Posted in Columns, Josh, Miscellaneous
Tagged bathroom, hair, haircut, shaving, shower, the shiner, toilet
The Uncanny Valley: The Unceasing Strangeness of the SyFy Channel
Fair warning: most of the video clips posted below are not safe for work, and many are mind-boggingly stupid as well. Seriously, don't watch them if there is anybody nearby who you want to respect you as a human being.
"After an African dinosaur ancestor of the crocodile is found, Dr. Campbell uses its DNA to create prototypes at Paula Kennedy's Read more [...]
The Daily Grind: Working 3 to 9 to 5
I guess what it comes down to is what kind of person you are. Do you play down to your competition, or do you do your best every time? Do you do only what is asked of you, or do you perform as well as you can no matter what your expectations are? Here's a question: what do you get paid for?Do you get paid to do the best job you possibly can? Or is it something else? Read more [...]
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Posted in Columns, Josh, Miscellaneous
Tagged 395, basketball, capitalism, jordan, kazaam, kobe, money, sales, Shaq